So, my last post was Thursday evening. Friday, I stayed with my mom and grandparents overnight, which was fun. Yesterday, Ian and I went to the Norfolk zoo for a few hours, and we were just exhausted when we got home. It was fun. I got to see super cute giraffes! That was probably my favorite part. It would have been the barnyard section, where you can pet the goats and stuff, but it was closed. So since the giraffes were my favorite part, I bought a small stuffed giraffe on our exit through the gift shop. I named him Junior Giraffe, and he is now the adopted son of Mr. Giraffe (another stuffed giraffe I already owned) and Mrs. Giraffe (my giraffe pillow pet).
I am just now realizing that giraffes are one of my favorite animals. It only took three separate occasions of receiving a new giraffe stuffed animal for this to occur to me. I just love their super long necks. I want to buy a giraffe, then ride him around. Who needs a car when you have A GIRAFFE.
So, anyway. I’m going to answer today’s, yesterday’s, and Friday’s questions now, from oldest to newest.
“What fears did you have today?”
I didn’t really have any fears today. There was really nothing to worry about. I get a little scared when playing stressful video games, which I did some today (and plan to continue later). I got the new Tomb Raider game yesterday, and it’s been fun. By “this video game scares me,” I don’t so much mean it literally makes me scared in the same way a scary movie would make me feel, or how a legitimately scary moment would frighten me. I more so mean… Let me see if I can explain this. Some video games (like Tomb Raider) make me feel tense, which kind of stresses me out, so even the littlest things make me jump/scare me, because I’m just sitting there tensed up, holding my breath, waiting for anything to happen, and when it does, I get “scared.” I guess it would be more accurate to say it just stresses me out, but. It kind of does scare me, but like I said, not necessarily because the game in itself is scary. (Even though some moments in this game are kind of scary.)
As for fears in general, I’ll list them out here:
Heights (even small ones, like standing on a chair [I’m always afraid I’ll fall and land wrong and break something]). Driving (I don’t have my license because of this). Bugs (always afraid they’ll crawl into like, my ear or nose or something and eat my insides). Dark (only when I’m alone, and that’s mostly because I’m afraid someone could break in and sneak up on me and kill me before I even notice). Pregnancy (the very idea gives me near panic attacks).
I also have a few very illogical (in the sense that I know statistically, chances are likely these things WON’T happen) situational fears that stem from major disasters/tragedies that I hear about on the news (or, sometimes, in movies). When I’m in a movie theater now, I’m afraid someone will come in and shoot me. I now make note of all exits before sitting down because of this. I fear bridges and tunnels will collapse as I pass over them, and that I won’t be able to get out of the car and I’ll drown, or I will get out of the car but I will get mauled by a shark or eaten by some other creepy fish whatever. Anytime I hear a plane pass overhead, I fear that it will dive straight down into wherever I am at the time.
Also, because of my IBS, I quite often fear I will not make it to the closest bathroom in time, and that I will poo my pants in front of everyone around me. Luckily, this has yet to happen, but it’s been pretty close to it on a frequent, regular basis.
I, of course, have not listed all of my fears here. There are a lot, and I would pretty much always be forgetting at least one.
“What did you forget?”
I forget a LOT of things, on a pretty much daily basis. I have a weird memory. I forget so many things that I should remember, but then I have these strange, random, absolutely meaningless memories that I can’t seem to ever forget. My mind seems to like making very strange connections, but then never over-writing them for more important knowledge that I need to remember. One of the types that happens a lot is when I’m having a longer conversation with someone over text (either via IM, text messages, whatever) and I’m listening to music in the background, I often tie one of the songs I listened to, to whoever I was speaking with. I have some people that now inextricably have a “their song,” and whenever I hear that song, I think of that person and bits and pieces of the conversation that was had that made that song “their song.”
That was a long tangent, but basically, to answer the question: There’s a lot of things I forget and have forgotten. To name just one notable example, I watched my high school graduation ceremony DVD the other weekend, and there was this one girl that I totally forgot even existed. When she walked the stage, I was like, “OH MY GOD! She exists! I totally forgot she was a person!” What makes this really awful is she was one of my better friends in high school. We shared a class together I believe, maybe two, and we ate lunch together for a whole entire year, at the same table. I felt embarrassed and ashamed that I could forget someone I considered to be a good (albeit not really close) friend. AND JUST NOW THINKING ABOUT THIS I remembered another girl just like that - shared classes, ate lunch with. Oh god. I am a horrible person.
“What is your favorite TV show?”
This is kind of a hard question. I don’t watch much TV anymore - the only shows I do watch now are streamed via Hulu or Netflix. My go-to answer for this question is usually Lost, though. It was an amazing, deeply lored show with some really amazing characters. Although, I wasn’t too thrilled with the ending; in fact, I absolutely rage-hated it when it aired. I’ve grown more accepting and neutral of it, now. More recently, I’ve fallen in love with the new Doctor Who. Even though I started with Eccleston, “my doctor” is Tennant. He was fun and quirky and - yes - cute. I enjoyed his episodes immensely. I wasn’t a huge fan of Matt Smith at first. After so many amazing Tennant episodes, Matt Smith just irked me because I found him so different from Tennant. But after watching more episodes of his, I really like him. But he will never replace Tennant, not in my heart!
So, I hope this entry made up for my lack of updates for the past two days. Have a super Sunday!